“We know what to do; we wait for permission to do it.”

Over my years as a therapist, I sensed my clients intuition knew exactly what they needed. Once their intuition was verified, they were on their way. If your intuiton speaks, listen. No permission needed. Just in case ….

YOU HAVE PERMISSION …

• to release everything that does not bring you joy. It doesn’t mean that you have to; but you have permission to. Everyone has the right to live in joy.

• to not do anything for anyone over the age of 18 that they should be doing for themselves. You weaken them and reinforce your own controlling behavior (although I know you mean well).

• to not be normal. ‘Normal’ was defined by Harvard male college sophomores in the 1950s during a series of experiments that set standards for human behavior.  You don’t fit those standards.

• to not buy anyone’s notion that it’s all in your head or not real. Instinct and intuition are real, trust them.

• to start admiring what you don’t like about yourself because it’s probably your greatest gift. Your procrastination is an exquisite sense of timing, your talkativeness is a gift of communication when you use it wisely, your shyness is a gift of observation and wisdom.

• to interpret what people label you as, to be your strength. Are you labeled as too sensitive? You are emotionally aware. Your label reveals your strength and the fact that it is annoying to others means that it is breaking through. People label what they’re afraid of.

• to believe that what you admire in others is already in you or you wouldn’t notice it (projection). If you don’t ‘own’ that quality that you see in others yet, watch for it every day; you’ll be amazed how it will grow.

• to feel guilty, because guilt means you are doing something right, something healthy for yourself. This is good. You’re living your truth, what’s right for you. You are breaking old norms from parents, church, school - some other institution that might not have your best interests at heart.

• to stop being ‘OK’ or ‘Fine’. Each time you say these, ask what you’re trying to cover up, what needs to be fixed, what self-nurturing needs to happen.

• to honor victories as victories. Overcoming fear is a big deal. It takes as much courage to overcome personal fears about speaking up or promoting yourself as it does to fly into space or climb Mt Everest. Fear is fear.

• to break old rules of “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” (people won’t always find your truth conveniently nice).  “Don’t brag and show off, people won’t like you.” (promoting yourself is simply letting your light shine).  “Wear clean underwear.” Well, maybe they had a point there.

• to relax. You’ve done enough. You are enough. Feeling you should have done more is an old story. Rewrite your story. Living in kindness and love is enough; I’ve got that on good word.